#9 – Living In Wisdomville – The Family
MEMORY VERSE: Proverbs 10:1
“A wise son maketh a glad father: but a foolish son is the heaviness of his mother.”
To live in Wisdomville, parents and children must live according to the Bible
For the most part, we do not live in a family friendly world. We live in a culture where careers, cars and cash are often more important than children. In this Bible study, you will find parenting principles and also, principles by which teens and children should live.
- Kids Need Acceptance – Proverbs 22:6 “___________________ up a ____________________ in the way he should go: (or Train up a child in the “bend” that God has given him)
Parents should grab every opportunity to let our kids know that we accept them for who they are—not for what they do. They need to know that our acceptance never changes. God has created every child unique. Many parents try to live out their dreams through their children and this leads to disaster. The only thing worse than peer pressure is parent pressure. Parents should discover, accept, and encourage the way God has made our kids. For example, if your child is not good at math, help them do their best, but do not make them be a CPA. If your child is not good in sports, don’t force it. If they are good at music, get them the instrument they want to play and pay for lessons.
- Kids Need Appreciation – Proverbs 16:21 “…and the ______________________ of the lips increaseth ________________________.” (or if my words are sweet, it increases learning)
If you want to raise good kids, brag, don’t nag. We are usually quick to criticize and slow to praise. It should be the opposite. Be positive. No child is even close to being perfect, so look for improvement and growth, not perfection. Look more for the things they do right instead of concentrating on what they do wrong. If you do not show appreciation for your child, someone else will, and it may be someone who will lead them away from the things of God.
- Kids Need Attention – Ephesians 6:4 “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to ____________________: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”
Kids cannot get too much attention. We have many angry, rebellious, misbehaving, wrathful kids because they do not/did not get proper attention in their lives. Few things provoke a child to wrath like not getting attention because they feel rejected, and the worst form of being rejected is being ignored. If kids can’t get attention by doing something good they will get it by doing something bad.
- Kids Need Authority – Proverbs 29:17 “________________________ thy son, and he shall give thee ____________________; yea, he shall give __________________________ unto thy soul.”
Kids do not need a pal; they need a parent who is a proper authority figure in their life. They need someone who will set boundaries or rules. Kids do not need suggestions, they need boundaries, which, when crossed, results in discipline. Proper discipline brings rest and delight to all. Everyone should know the difference between discipline and punishment. Discipline promotes change, while punishment inflicts pain. Discipline focuses on future correct behavior, while punishment focuses on past behavior. Discipline is done in love, while punishment is usually done out of frustration or anger.
- Kids Need Apologies – Proverbs 11:2 “When pride cometh, then cometh shame: but with the lowly is wisdom.”
We need to tell our kids we make mistakes. There are times we need to ask forgiveness of others especially our children when we are grumpy, forgetful, unkind, or just plain wrong about something. Pride causes us not to do so. But my pride brings me shame whereas humility brings wisdom. Allow humility to win.
Our Kids Need _________________________, ________________________, _____________________, ___________________________ and __________________________
A WISE SON OR DAUGHTER WILL HONOR THEIR PARENTS
- Honor Your Parents By Hearing Them – Proverbs 1:8 “My son, ___________________ the instruction of thy _________________, and forsake not the law of thy __________________:”
It is given that these parents are wise and godly. A child should listen closely to their counsel and be obedient to his parent’s instructions and teachings. A wise son will hear. A fool will not.
- Honor Your Parents By Bringing Them Joy and Not Sadness
A foolish son/daughter brings much hurt, sorrow, grief, anguish, and pain to his/her parents:
- Proverbs 10:1 “…A ________________ son maketh a ___________________ father: but a _______________________ son is the _____________________________ of his mother.”
- Proverbs 17:21 “He that begetteth a fool doeth it to his sorrow: and the _________________ of a _________________________ hath no ___________________________.”
- Proverbs 19:13 “A foolish son is the ________________ of his father:…” (Calamity has the idea of the child as no longer a blessing to the family but now a burden, a troublesome evil and a very great misfortune)
A wise son/daughter brings intense joy, gladness, rejoicing and excitement to his/her parents
- Proverbs 23:24-25 “The ______________ of the righteous shall greatly ________________: and he that begetteth a ______________ child shall have _____________________ of him. Thy _______________ and thy __________________ shall be _________________, and she that bare thee shall rejoice.”
- Proverbs 15:20 “A ___________________ son maketh a _____________________ father: but a _____________________ man despiseth his ___________________________.”
- Honor Your Parents By Avoiding The Consequences of the Fool
Proverbs 11:29 “He that _______________________ his own house shall inherit the wind: …”
The fool is one who brings trouble to his house. He turns a calm home into chaos. A foolish son/daughter turns a happy and prosperous home into one of confusion, perplexity and distress. By his/her actions, the foolish son/daughter distresses his whole house. The reward for doing so is to inherit the wind. He ends up with nothing.
Proverbs 20:20 “Whoso ______________________ his father or his mother, his ________________ shall be put out in obscure darkness.”
The one who dishonors his parents will have their lamp put out and will be in complete darkness. Lamps in Bible days were kept burning all night. The origin of the custom may have been to preserve themselves from the serpents and other noxious reptiles. If the light was out, there was great danger. The fool who mocks his father and despises his mother brings great danger to his life.
- Honor Your Parents By Striving For The Rewards of the Wise
Proverbs 1:8-9 “My son, ______________ the _____________________ of thy ________________, and _____________________ not the law of thy ____________________: For they shall be an ornament of grace unto thy head, and chains about thy neck.”
Beautiful adornments to the head and neck were given to wise sons, indicating to others that they had embraced the teachings and instructions of the parents which resulted in wise living. A young man can be like a glorious prince with a crown on his head and chains on his neck. There are two conditions – parents to teach him God’s wisdom, and his obedience to that instruction. If either is missing, a young man will grow up dysfunctional and disgraceful. The only remedies in such a case are the powerful grace of God, intervention of other teachers, and/or his devoted diligence to overcome such a handicap to success.
HONOR YOUR PARENTS
- By _____________________Them – By Bringing Them _________________ and Not Sadness
- By _________________The Consequences of the Fool – By _________________ For The Rewards of the Wise